Bible Humor

Bible Humor and holy humor have a unique characteristic. They are thought-provoking in addition to being funny!



Some of the following Christian one liners are more serious, but all are food for thought! Bible humor is never more than a sentence away!



Christian One Liners

This is one line humor with a holy twist!

Don't let your worries get the

best of you; remember, Moses started

out as a basket case.

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Some people are kind, polite, and

sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.

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Many folks want to serve God,

but only as advisors.

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It is easier to preach ten sermons

than it is to live one.

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The good Lord didn't create anything

without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close..

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When you get to your wit's end,

you'll find God lives there.

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People are funny; they want the front

of the bus, the middle of the road, and

the back of the church...

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Opportunity may knock once, but temptation

bangs on your front door forever.

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Quit griping about your church;

if it was perfect, you couldn't belong..

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If the church wants a better preacher,

it only needs to pray for the one it has.

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God Himself does not propose to judge

a man until he is dead. So why should you?

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Some minds are like concrete

thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.

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Peace starts with a smile..

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A lot of church members who are singing

'Standing on the Promises'

are just sitting on the premises.

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We were called to be witnesses,

not lawyers or judges..

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Be ye fishers of men.. You catch

them - He'll clean them.

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Coincidence is when God

chooses to remain anonymous.

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Don't put a question mark

where God put a period.

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Don't wait for 6 strong men

to take you to church.

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Forbidden fruits create many jams.

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God doesn't call the qualified,

He qualifies the called.

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God grades on the cross, not the curve.

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God loves everyone, but probably prefers

'fruit of the spirit' over a 'religious nut!'

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God promises a safe landing,

not a calm passage.

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He who angers you, controls you!

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If God is your Co-pilot - swap seats!

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Prayer:

Don't give God instructions -- just report for duty!

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The task ahead of us is never as

great as the Power behind us.

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The Will of God never takes you to

where the Grace of God will not protect you.

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We don't change the message,

the message changes us

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You can tell how big a person is

by what it takes to discourage him.

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The best mathematical equation

I have ever seen:

1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* - via e-mail

Check out some of the other pages on this site
for more gut-wrenching Bible humor!



Christian Clean Jokes

Clean Bible Humor

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